Friday, October 01, 2004

On impulse

The other day, I made an impulse purchase. I used to make impulse purchases all the time. Years ago some inner sense went horribly awry, just for a week or so (must've been the flu) — the impulses were all wrong, and the purchases were all returned. I learned to stave of the impulse and eventually fell out of the habit. These days I find myself wanting to have the impulse, and I never do.

I went looking for it, because I just wanted to see it, even though I'd already noted to a certain someone that it would make the perfect birthday gift for me. But my birthday seems dreadfully far away, and if it were no longer available, I'd be devastated. I saw it, and had to have it. Now. So I bought it.

The Clash: London Calling, Legacy Edition.

Can you believe — 25 effing years?!

I actually had trouble locating the CD in the store. Even after all these years, The Clash has not migrated to the rock/pop section of the music store, at least not at this outlet. I purchased a CD filed under "punk," and being the age that I am, this gave me a certain thrill, though I did pause and wonder to myself, "Is punk dead? Did it die of old age? Is this the section for 30-something moms-desperately-clinging-to-shreds-of-youth with babies in strollers? How come there's no other cool babies out shopping with their cool moms at this hour?"

Yesterday, I was feeling sorry for myself for the following reasons:
-My cold is lingering. Every morning my head is heavy with mucous.
-I was losing a day's work because I had to hang out with Helena, the office building in which her daycare is located being blocked due to strike action.
-I still didn't have a chance to hear The Vanilla Tapes, cuz Helena just wasn't into it. She wanted to listen to her baby music.
-I have neither time nor inclination to read for pleasure. The Grim Grotto (not an impulse — a deliberate and methodically plotted purchase) is just sitting there, staring at me.
-The house is a mess, cuz J-F having been away last weekend and all of us feeling under the weather, we have quickly fallen off our schedule of chores.
-I need some mothering, but there's too much work to do so I can't go visit my mom quite yet; besides which my mom is still mad at me for besmirching the family name. When we do go visit, she'll be too busy grandmothering anyway.

This morning, I'm issuing invoices for vast amounts of money, all part of my plan to return to the comfortable path of consumerism, while listening to my music very loudly.
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